I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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