They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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