umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
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