love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Randomize
