do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Randomize
