If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
Quick, to the slutcave!
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
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