the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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