oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
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