did you get engaged???
i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
