I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Randomize