she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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