Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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