I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize
