Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
