just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
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