I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
