quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
