we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
