can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
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