Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Did we literally take a cab across the street
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
