I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Randomize
