Betty ford says i'm here all night
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Randomize
