I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Randomize
