Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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