it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize
