She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
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