Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
