You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
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