sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize
