That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
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