sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Randomize
