is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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