I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Is Oprah even human
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
Then you guys just all showered together...?
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
