Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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