Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
