then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
