She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
