So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize