Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
