forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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