who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
