the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
