ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
