Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize