We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Randomize
