Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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