i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
