you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
