he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
