u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
I did not marry a roomba.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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